Dear Three-Hole-Punch,

Look, you're a "Three-hole-punch". So that's what you do,
you punch three damn holes. That's your job. My job is to do other things. Sometimes with paper, sometimes without, but whatever it happens to be, i fucking do it. You on the other hand, are having difficulties performing the one task you were brought here to do. And because of this, I my work load is increased, as i continually have to take on the duties of punching three goddamn holes. *That's your job*. Do it, would you. You're perfect for it, so why don't you work?
Sometimes you'll punch a hole or two, but never three. And when you do punch one, it never comes all the way out. So i've got to get the scissors and finish your job.
I'm trying to hold up my end of things around here, and i honestly believe that things could go really smoothly around my desk area if we could just get along. Wait, fuck that. We don't have to be friends, you just have to do your damn job when it's asked of you.

Thanks,
JDM